“The marks humans leave are too often scars.” – John Green
Author: Carter Quinn
Pages/Word Count: 361 Pages
Rating: 5 Stars
Blurb: A childhood of abuse has left Avery so physically and emotionally scarred he believes he shouldn’t be alive. His only sanctuary has been his relationship with his older foster brother Sam. Avery finally lets Sam convince him to start therapy to help overcome his crippling anxiety, but even that can’t prepare him for the upheaval caused by meeting Noah Yates.
Noah is everything Avery fears. He’s large and physically powerful—and undeniably capable of destroying Avery’s hard-earned progress. Although Noah seems to have a tender streak when it comes to him, Avery is terrified of being victimized again. But no matter how many times he tries to push him away, Noah never goes far.
Noah wants to save Avery, but can he be the catalyst Avery needs to begin the journey out of the blackness?
Review: Carter Quinn is a friend of a friend. Our friend-in-common had been telling me for about six months that I “had to read” his book. Having learned in the past that the best predictor of how much I will like a book is how much a friend with similar tastes liked the book, I knew I’d have to move it up my TBR. I am so glad I finally got to it! I wish I hadn’t waited so long, because I had a book hangover for days afterward and got behind in my reviews! Noah and Avery stayed with me. They were in my thoughts for a long time after I finished reading their story.
Avery was so badly abused as a child that he is afraid of everything. The only person he can be at all comfortable around is his foster brother, Sam, with whom he now lives. The anxiety that controls Avery’s life makes it impossible for him to function on a normal level. Sam is ultra patient and loving with him, but Sam is in love and at some point, Avery knows Sam will want to get married and move out of their apartment. This causes his anxiety to go into overdrive. It also convinces Avery that he needs to start seeing a counselor to help him eventually get a victory over his fears.
The way Avery behaves when Sam spends an infrequent night with his girlfriend is heartbreaking to read. I was sobbing as I read it. I am grateful that Carter Quinn didn’t go into a lot of detail about the abuse Avery survived. As an incest survivor, it is difficult to read about abuse details sometimes, but Carter handled it wonderfully. He alluded to and hinted at without giving many particulars about Avery’s past.
Noah is everything in a man that Avery is terrified by. Noah is big and strong and loud and fills a room with his persona. He is also sweet and gentle and able to make himself seem smaller and is one of the most patient, loving men ever created on the page. Avery tries and tries to push Noah away, but can’t seem to rid himself of the gentle, loving giant. While he is terrified of being brutalized again, he finds himself trusting Noah more and more.
Out of the Blackness is a direct reference to one of Avery’s behaviors in the book which is triggered by his fear of being alone. As he lets Noah into his life a little at a time and into his heart even more slowly, he allows Noah to see the darkness. Avery is then able to see that with Noah’s love, he might be able to find his way, finally, out of the blackness.
The love story Carter Quinn has created is such a sweet, warm romance. He proves that although Noah is as big as all outdoors, his heart is just as big. He is big enough that Avery can put his trust in Noah to protect him and even believe that he can survive the blackness on his own.
A giant recommendation!