Please help us welcome author Oleander Plume to TNA today, here to introduce her new novel, Horatio Slice: Guitar Slayer of the Universe. She has an excerpt from the book to share with you, as well as a great giveaway, so be sure to check out the Rafflecopter widget below for all the details.
Hello, everyone! I’d like to thank Lisa and The Novel Approach for letting me visit today to talk about my upcoming book, Horatio Slice: Guitar Slayer of the Universe. Published by the wonderful folks at Go Deeper Press, Horatio will be released on July 24, 2017. This book was so much fun to write, I hope it will be as enjoyable to read. Would you like an exclusive preview? Great! But first, a little background…
About the Book
Gunner Wilkes is sure of one thing: his rock idol, Horatio Slice, didn’t explode in a pyrotechnics mishap like the press is claiming – he was sucked through a portal into another dimension.
After building a machine he hopes will bring the rock god back to Earth, Gunner falls into an adventure beyond his wildest dreams.
Featuring a cast of horny characters, Horatio Slice: Guitar Slayer of the Universe, is the epic, pornographic, sci-fi/fantasy adventure you didn’t know you needed.
About the Excerpt
Horatio Slice: Guitar Slayer of the Universe started as a short story submission. About three pages in, I realized Horatio’s adventure couldn’t be contained in 10,000 words or less.
While I think plotting is a great idea, I don’t adhere to the practice, preferring to sit down and go where the story takes me, which is exactly the approach I took when writing Guitar Slayer. Along the way, I added quite a few unexpected characters, Snake Vinter (the space pirate/vampire), being one.
Snake wasn’t supposed to be a vampire. At least not at first. It was during this exact scene that my space pirate grew fangs…
Snake sat next to Gunner on the couch and slung an arm across the back of his neck. “How are you feeling?”
“Moderately freaked out.” Gunner resisted the urge to rest his head against Snake, but he couldn’t stop himself from staring at the generous bulge in Snake’s suede pants. “Do you know why Meridian kidnapped Horatio in the first place?”
“We’ve been trying to figure that out for two years.” Snake lowered his voice. “I think he wants Horatio for his love slave. I mean, can you blame the guy?”
A vision popped into Gunner’s head: Horatio, naked and on his knees, wrists bound together with a red rope, begging to suck Gunner’s dick. “Um, wow. I guess not.” Gunner shivered. “So, where are we?”
“Is this a planet?”
“No, it’s another dimension,” Snake said. “Contrary to common perception, space travel is impossible. The only way to access another world is to create a portal. See, I can do it with magic, but another way is to use a machine similar to the one you invented.”
“How many dimensions are there?”
Snake blew out a breath. “Good question. Thousands, I suppose. A few of them are planets, some are unpopulated, and some are full of ferocious beasts. Stay away from Turquin if you want to keep your appendages, boy.”
“Stop calling me ‘boy.’ I’m twenty-two years old.”
(Note from Oleander: Here. Right here. This is the part where Snake felt … vampy. So, he became a vampire, and I’ve never regretted the decision.)
“Pfffbt. Twenty-two—just a babe. I’m two-hundred.”
“What?” Gunner asked, perplexed, since Snake appeared to be about twenty. “How is that possible?” Snake smiled, and his canine teeth extended into long fangs. Gunner’s balls tried to crawl up his ass. “You’re a vampire?”
“Sure am. Guess where I prefer to bite?” Gunner flinched when Snake placed his hand over Gunner’s crotch and gave a gentle squeeze. “Too bad for you. I’m not thirsty at the moment.”
A vampire. Snake was a fucking vampire. Gunner’s mind sifted through memories of every Dracula movie he’d ever seen. “You can be out during the day?”
“Yeah, I’m different than the vampires in your Earth movies—Horatio told me about those. I don’t turn into a bat or sleep in a coffin, and when I look in a mirror, I can see my reflection just fine.”
“What about the killing thing?”
“You mean, can I suck every ounce of blood from your body until your heart stops?”
Gunner covered the front of his neck with one hand. “Can you?”
“Of course.” Snake moved Gunner’s hand out of the way and brushed a light kiss over his throat. “But you would never be on my kill list, so relax.”
“Good to know.” Gunner poured himself another shot and sucked it down. “So, how did you and Horatio hook up?”
“That’s a long story better saved for another day.” Snake took a swig straight from the bottle before planting a boozy kiss on Gunner’s lips. “Damn, Slayer nicknamed you right. You are a cutie.”
“Thanks,” Gunner said. “You are, too. I mean, you’re really….” Gunner couldn’t come up with an appropriate word to describe Snake, except maybe “fuck-a-licious,” but he didn’t want to say the word out loud to a cool vampire like Snake.
“Shy, aren’t you?” Snake said as he played with Gunner’s hair. “Makes you even more irresistible.” Snake’s corneas were two swirling pools of mercury. Gunner could have stared into them forever. Knowing Snake was a vampire explained a lot about his appearance. While at first glance he looked human, further scrutiny of Snake’s features gave hints that he was not from Earth. Besides their unique, metallic color, Snake’s eyes were wider than normal and slanted upward at the outer corners. His skin was flawless to the point of looking airbrushed, and the way his plump lips curved into a perpetual smile put Gunner at ease, despite the fangs hidden behind them. “I could play with you for hours.” Snake’s voice was audible honey. “I’d start with your lips and work my way down. Would you let me?”
Gunner opened his mouth to answer Snake’s question, but no words came. It was as if he was under a spell, a sexy spell he rather enjoyed. Gunner stopped breathing when Snake’s hand slid inside his baggy jeans. He guessed Snake was about to reach lower, until Horatio appeared clad in black, from his combat boots to his long leather coat. The dark clothing made Horatio’s eyes appear bluer. Gunner’s heart raced. He wanted to whistle at Horatio or tell him he was sexy as fuck, but Gunner was still woozy from Snake’s hypnotic gaze and roving fingers. Fingers that resumed digging for his cock.
“You ready to go?” Horatio asked Snake.
“I suppose.” Snake found Gunner’s balls and rolled them together. “I should have a quick nip before we set off, though.”
Gunner giggled like he was drunk on three-dollar wine. “Dude, he’s a vampire!” Gunner said to Horatio.
“He’s also not thirsty. I can tell because his lips are dark. When he needs blood, they turn pale. His eyes turn different shades of silver, too. You feelin’ stoned, kid?” Horatio asked Gunner.
“Yeah.” Gunner leaned back and let Snake continue to roam, involuntarily lifting his hips as if he was trying to fuck Snake’s palm. “Kinda.”
“He did that,” Horatio wiggled his fingers in front of Gunner’s eyes, “with his freaky vampire powers.” Horatio pointed at Snake. “Freaky.”
“Right,” Snake said, still stroking Gunner’s dick. “You bend over for me because of my hypnotic powers. The fact that you’re a naughty little Nancy has nothing to do with it.”
Horatio flipped his hair back and laughed. “You’ve got me there, Snake. I am the horniest of the horny toads.” He showed Snake the blood-red guitar he’d been carrying. “This one’s your favorite, right?”
Snake removed his hand from Gunner’s jeans and took the guitar. “Yeah. Old Red. We’ve shared some good times. Where’s yours?”
Horatio turned. He had a metallic blue twelve string slung across his back.
“Whoa! That’s the one you disappeared with!” Gunner stood up, cock still swollen from Snake’s groping, and gingerly touched the glossy indigo surface. “It’s gorgeous.”
“I wrote my best tunes with this baby.” Horatio picked up Gunner’s Gibson. “This one looks kind of familiar.”
“It’s yours. I bought it off eBay.”
Gunner turned the instrument over. “See, there’s your autograph. Told you I’m a fan.” Gunner liked the way Horatio grinned as he strapped the Gibson across Gunner’s back. “I don’t know how to play it, though.”
“We all need to be armed. Besides, I’ll teach you.” Horatio’s kiss made Gunner’s balls tighten and his stomach flip.
“Come on. We need to go outside so I can make a portal,” Snake said.
“Why can’t we do it inside?” The possibility of running into another liver bird made Gunner dizzy.
“Horatio’s house is cloaked to prevent Meridian from sneaking a portal in here. Consequently, we can’t make one, either,” Snake said. “If the big oaf didn’t wank outdoors, we wouldn’t even be having this conversation.”
“You know what’s weird? I never jerk off outside, but, today, I had an urge.” Horatio smiled at Gunner, causing his guts to whirl around again. He wondered if finding Horatio was destiny or dumb luck.
Snake pointed to the door. “Let’s go.”
“Wait,” Horatio said. “Gotta grab something.” He pulled a small plastic bottle out of a side table drawer. “Lube. Just in case.” Horatio wagged his eyebrows at Gunner while he slipped it into his coat pocket.
Gunner scowled at Horatio. “You won’t need lube. Trust me.”
“Unlike you,” Horatio said, “I choose to think positive.”
Gunner raised his hands in protest. Snake grabbed one, Horatio grabbed the other, and in a blink, they were out the front door and hurtling through space.
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First Prize: a print copy of Horatio Slice: Guitar Slayer of the Universe to one winner (US Only)
Second Prize: an e-copy of Horatio Slice: Guitar Slayer of the Universe to three winners (Open World-wide)
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